Explications

If it hadn't been for my aunt (the wife of the Italian), Mum's cousin, my cousin and pole-dancing, I would have committed suicide. For the first time in my life I was appreciated for who I was. The dirty image of a woman I'd been given evaporated.

As I've already said, the two greatest discoveries of my life have been the realisation that, biblically speaking:
  1. divorce was a legal practice and that
  2. man is not born corrupt, but human.
What 5 years of theological studies had enabled me to realise – little by little – in theory, pole-dancing allowed me to discover in real life: The female sex is not dirty, horny and keen to seduce every man at the first opportunity, but benevolent.  Here, in less than 4 years I have received more appreciation from an army of black-hearted women than in 17 years of marriage to a white-hearted wife and over 40 years in a movement that claims to be whiter than snow. The world of the pole is safe and benevolent. Here, unlike in church, you are not judged by the length or colour of your hair or nails. The only things that are not tolerated are inappropriate, sexist or demeaning behaviour. Try groping a pole dancer in a pole studio once! You'll remember it for a very long time, and so will the studio with all its coaches and students! ​Here, the human is welcome but the inhuman rejected. I warmly recommend watching the documentary ‘Strip Down, Raise-Up’ on Netflix (here). I cried when I watched it. The Pole community is my safe and caring place. Here, I'm safe and appreciated. And I know for a fact that many coachs and students feel and experience the same! 

Here’s a little anecdote to illustrate the spirit of camaraderie in this sport: At the Swiss Championships in 2026, Kim Gartmann, a multiple Swiss and world champion, congratulated me on the starfish, a trick I performed during an Ultra-Pole battle, and then added that she had failed to execute it at one of the world championships. You see, instead of listing all the figures she can do better than me (not to mention the ones I can’t do at the moment), she highlighted the one I’d managed better than her. 
As pole is an extreme sport, my body – on the verge of collapse – couldn't keep up. I quickly was forced to stop practicing pole dancing in autumn 2021. My whole back, especially the right side, was inflamed. After a 3-month break, a fitness coach advised me to take up pole again despite everything, ‘because’, he told me, ‘the human body is made to move’. So, on 22 December 2021, I walked through the door of the gym again on a regular basis. Suddenly I found myself back in a caring environment, in a context where I was appreciated. My body's reaction to this was stunning: For about 3 months, I sweated so much at night on my pyjamas that I had to change them one to four times a night. For the first month this happened every night without exception. Then the pace slowed down. I had to buy new pyjamas and to wash every few days. To make sure I didn't have cancer, I went to see the family doctor. ​
When you've been on the verge of suicide after 42 years of slavery, you don't just get back up again overnight:
Over the first four years following the separation (2021-2025), I have suffered from various inflammations, tendinopathies, partial tendon tears, epicondylitis, lumbagos, etc. I also had other symptoms, such as sudden hearing loss accompanied by tinnitus in 2023 and vision problems, which are typical of nervous and mental exhaustion. It should also be noted that I have permanent and irreversible slight hearing loss in my left ear. ​​Since my youth, I have struggled with sleep problems my whole life because I almost couldn't cope with the pious delusion and the black heart. It is tragic that it was precisely my cries for help, both mental and physical, that drove me even further into religious fanaticism. Somehow, I was carnal and convinced that I would be able to get my problems under control if only I became spiritual enough. 
Here is a list of the medications and methods I have tried, often in combination, to control my sleep. And despite thess cocktails, I have not been able to sleep properly:
  • Xanax mg (finally, the double dose, combined with Stilnox)
  • Zolpidem / Stilnox (finally, the triple dose, combined with Xanax)
  • Quvivic
  • Quetiapin 100 mg
  • Melatonin (synthetic hormone)
  • Zeller sommeil forte (herbal medecine) 
  • Laitea (herbal medecine) 
  • Ashwa-Gandha (herbal medecine)
  • Sleep tea
  • Trazodon (antidepressant)
  • Surmontil / Trimipramine (antidepressant)
  • Valdoxan / Agomelatin-Mepha (antidepressant)
  • Light therapy: red light in the evening
  • Light therapy: Green light in the morning
  • Electrical stimulator for the vagus nerve in the neck
  • Vagus nerve stimulator on the earlobes
  • Breathing exercises
  • White noise
The list is not exhaustive; nor is it in the right order, as I tried various different combinations over the years. And, these are only the medications I can remember. The list of antidepressants is particularly incomplete. However, they consistently had the opposite effect. Instead of sleeping well, my insomnia worsened. The only exception was Surmontil, and even then, only at high doses and accompanied by side effects. My nervous system was completely out of whack. After living my whole life in ‘fight or flight’ mode, my brain was unable to return to a normal state. Even my doctor didn't know what to do. I even suggested accepting my dependence on sleeping pills at the cost of taking very high doses for the rest of my life. But given the potential long-term health risks associated with these drugs, he opposed this. Since February 2024, I have been weaned off sleeping pills after more than 10 years of dependence. Since the summer of 2025, I have been sleeping well and my body has been able to rest for the first time in its life. 
​In the meantime, I am also an athlete and took part in the Pole & Aerial Swiss Championships in Geneva in May 2024, 2025 and 2026. Now I am also preparing for the world championships in Czech Republic. 

The Song

In order to put the song into context, I advise the reader to listen to the song only after reading all the pages (personal and theological) on my website. 

Lyrics

The lyrics below are translated from French. In order to see the original text, click here: 
Strophe 1
Monday 12 July 2021
Deregister from the course, you're a nothing
You can't handle too many girls, too many boobs

But on the way out, for the first time, 
I'm puzzled, muttering, ‘that's it!’
I leave the room and feel like a king

Everyone appreciates me, says ‘go for it!
I turn round and wonder if they're talking about me
I'll make it, weird thought, that's what they think

​For the first time I let go, I'm me
I stop thinking, there's no need to 
my words come out all by themselves, everything's self-evident
Refrain
Don't you understand that it's at the Pole that I blossom 
Don't you understand, here my past runs away
Strophe 2
My nearest and dearest suspect striptease
Chris practices sin, it's a crisis
judging appearance without knowing, that's their motto 
(now he's gone completely off the rails, I tell you... oh yeah)

The world is black, but some Christians are white
According to Saint Augustine, what a damning dogma
The doctrine of Mani with a bit of Moses amalgamating

I'm discovering a world I've never seen
I reveal the fables I have always believed
Lies with a pious appearance, I lay them bare
(I lay them bare)

I see a world in colour
no longer black or white, I free myself from fear
Femininity in all its gleams, I embrace my sister 
(I embrace my sister)
Refrain
Don't you understand that it's at the Pole that I blossom 
Don't you see, here my past runs away
Can't you see it's therapy (oh yeah)
End
12 July 2021
Don't even try it, you're a nothing
You can't handle it, too many girls, too many boobs
(too many boobs)

But on the way out, for the first time, 
I'm leaving like a king
(You know, the pole is just .... waouh) 

Is poledance striptease?

Watch these videos that I have made: 

Music-Clips I made: 

By Chris Zürcher. Page updated on 8 March 2026